Day Jobs

Mood: Slumpy. Music: Um, what did I listen to? Oh, yeah, Alison Moyet--Alf (it's great stuff, really. It's just that I was so tired this morning. Book Club ran late last night.)Writing: more revision (rewriting) chapter 7 (lots of dialogue and it's killing me) Todays Quote:

"go! little novelist, go!" -Justine Larbalestier

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I love my job as a Librarian (Library Media Specialist for those of you who are in the current re-name old jobs to make them sound more techie phase), I mean, what could be better than telling kids about absolutely great YA books? And I need my job too--pays for the dentist (who's going to pull two of my daugther's teeth later today), puts food on the table (pretty much just turkey and ham lately. The turkey was frozen Thanksgiving morning, so we ran to the store and bought a ham. Now we have both.), and pays for my book habit (although, it still doesn't quite cover a bigger house which is rapidly becoming necessary given all the books I buy). But occassionally the dream of being able to write all day creeps into even my waking thoughts. Getting up in the morning, fetching a hot cup of cappucino and then booting up my trusty Mac and start writing (or rewriting as the case may be) Maybe napping or taking a shower when I get stuck, but being able to go back to it and finish my thought, finish the chapter.

Unfortunantly, I'm not willing to give anything up--job, family, reading time--so this is just a pointless rant. But there you go.

It hasn't helped that I've been reading Justine Larbalestier's blog (and her husband Scott Westerfeld's blog as well). They are so...in the know. In the writer's life. I'm sure they go to the grocery store and bathroom and all that mundane stuff just like the rest of us. But it's their JOB to write, not something they sneak away to do when everyone is sleeping or when they are really supposed to be helping some student look up B.F. Skinner in the biographical encyclopedia. (Oh, I didn't know I was supposed to look under the last name!)

Part of the problem is I'm in a slumpy mood about my writing. Depressed and sure that it's all crap and I should start over but even if I do it will never be quite as good as [insert famous author's name here]--which means writing will never be my JOB, just something that "mom" or "my wife" does for the fun of it. (yeah, kind of like people go through childbirth for the fun of it.)

This is the point where--if he were here--my husband would tell me I need some sleep. And he'd be right. But instead I'd better get out there and help those seventh graders figure out where to find information (in actual books and not JUST on the internet) about their scientists.

Day job, can't pay the bills without it. Writing, can't live without it.

Humorous Dialogue

Mood: Playful. Music: Dixie Chicks--Taking the Long Way. Writing: Revising chapter seven (actually, re-writing it is more accurate) Today's Quote: (inspired by RyterNRezdence's post Putting Pen to Paper (Metaphorically Speaking) )

"And yet." Those are my two favorite words, applicable to every situation,
be it happy or bleak. The sun is rising? And yet it will set. A night of
anguish? And yet, it, too, will pass. The important thing is to shun
resignation, to refuse to wallow in sterile fatalism." --Elie Wiesel

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How does a writer make a character and his/her dialogue funny when the writer is not a particularly funny person? I mean, I'm funny sometimes, but usually it's by accident. I have a good sense of humor, but I'm not witty. Yet at least one of my characters is--and I'm having difficulties (think tickling laughs out of the dry, blank page) writing dialogue that shows this part of his personality. I've tried asking my husband what he'd say in certain situations--because he is a witty person--but if I don't explain what I'm doing, he thinks I'm nuts. And if I explain (he still thinks I'm nuts), it kind of ruins that spontaneous comeback I'm going for. Still, I have to admit I'm having fun playing with that sort of tongue-in-cheek dialogue.

I'm also playing with cliches and folk sayings in this MS (manuscript). The MC's (main character's) mother is forever quoting some saying or another (All mothers do, don't they? I caught myself saying "Someone is gonna end up crying," to my daughters just yesterday!). I wonder about putting a glossary or appendix at the end of the book with the general meaning and origin of all the sayings/cliches used in the book. I don't know if that's a good idea or not--but it is pretty interesting to see where these common well-known phrases come from.

Anyway, I hope you are writing. And yet, there is always tomorrow.

Form Rejections

Mood: plodding. Music: Tori Amos--Beekeeper. Writing: nothing today. Today's Quotes: "I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top."  ~English Professor (Name Unknown), Ohio University. "Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good."  ~Author Unknown, commonly misattributed to Samuel Johnson

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So okay, given those quotes, maybe form rejections aren't all bad. In fact, the first one I received made me feel pretty good because it was addressed: Dear Author. They called me an author! Pretty heady stuff. But after 6 or 7 of those letters, it no longer has the same effect. When a publishing company responded to my query letter by requesting my manuscript, a big part of me was pretty sure I'd still get rejected. But there was that small part. The part called hope that dies hard. So it wasn't that I didn't expect rejection--it was that it was a form letter that told me nothing--taught me nothing. I'm a teacher, and so I'm always looking for that teachable moment. I have to continually remind myself that editors and publishing companies are not in the teaching business. It's poor comfort.

The biggest comfort came from friends who are writers--who have been there, done that. Just having another writer (a more experienced writer) say, "Form rejections suck," helped me feel better. I'm not the only one who has had to endure this. And it does suck, but there it is. And then I had another writer (published at that) tell me she has heard editors say that if they have no intention of publishing a MS, they don't want to make comments that might be taken by the author for revision. They feel any comments should be left for an editor who is interested in publishing the manuscript. That made me feel better too. At least I can see the logic in it.

Form rejections still suck, but my writing group gave me good suggestions for revisions on my second manuscript, and other writing friends encouraged me to keep writing, to believe, to trust. And even though that's hard for me right now, it's okay, because they are willing to trust and believe for me. And I'll pick it up again soon. After all, Alfred Kazin said (Think, Feb. 1963), "The writer writes in order to teach himself, to understand himself, to satisfy himself; the publishing of his ideas, though it brings gratification, is a curious anticlimax."

Putting Pen to Paper (Metaphorically Speaking)

OK.

Yesterday I fulfilled my promise and I actually got about half of one of my articles written. The other half, and another whole article, are due soon and I need to wrestle them to the mat (I've recently realized my conversational speech is cliche-riddled).

Part of the problem is that these are two of the most difficult articles I have yet to write. The subject is community, and the good things that are happening in it. The problem is, the community I'm writing about covers a huge geographic area in south GR, and within that area are many different social factions (race, economy, poverty) that don't come together easily. I'm supposed to report on the renewal happening in the southeast neighborhoods, and, while not ignoring the "downers," not making an issue of them, either.

The problem, as I have discovered too late, is that the geographic region is simply too large. We should have made it smaller (which my editor DID do after a conversation about my concerns, but it should have been shaved even more). As I said, too late.

So. Because the task is hard, because putting the pieces together is brain-challenging and time-consuming, because I'm afraid of being a failure at it (which, intellectually, I KNOW I won't be), and because I often set myself up to be a victim (Oh, gee, I tried to write it, but it was just too overwhelming, blah blah blah), the articles are still hanging over my head, and I'm stressed and unhappy.

And yet.

I have control over it, and could have dispensed with the writing a week ago and it would now be behind me and I could look forward to a long holiday weekend with family. But no. That's not how I operate.

Well, the jig is up. Tonight I finish article one, even though I'm only just getting ready to start on it and it's 10:15 PM. And before the day is done tomorrow, article two will be, too. (Thank goodness, our Turkey day was last Sunday). That means, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday I will be free to be with family. That's my promise to myself. No more setting me up. No more setting the work down.

Life's too short, and I'm in it for the long haul.

Check Out the Accidental Blogger

Hi All,

When trying to figure out how to blog on the PWWriter blog, I accidentally created my own blog site, thinking that was what I was supposed to do.

So, I now have my own blog site. Accidentally. www.ryternrezdence.blogspot.com

Another excuse not to write--I won't have time. I'll be too busy keeping my blogs up to date!

Keep smiling!

Life in the Not-so-fast Writing Lane

Well, after all my good intentions to write a story that's due for the magazine, I carted my ancient laptop to the coffeehouse, got my soy latte, got everything plugged in (because my battery is ancient and all dried up), signed on and...did nothing but research. Yes, it was research for the article (finishing up some small details I hadn't yet gathered), and yes, it was productive. But no, it wasn't writing.

I continually amaze myself at my ability to procrastinate. And it's not just procrastination, per se, that's so slack-jaw-ably mind-blowing; it's the danged hanging back, hanging around, hanging on a dream that keeps me from doing the one thing I really want to do (write) and leaves me scratching my head, saying "Where'd the time go?"

So, the day is now done, and the writing is yet to be done. The time to be with family is here, the time to write has flown, and tomorrow, I promise, tomorrow I shall transpose the phrases a-swirl in my head into straight, neat lines on the monitor screen.

Either that, or I'll use my creative talents to conjure up more excuses.

Enthusiasm

Mood: business-like. Music: Sarah McLachlan--Fumbling toward Ecstasy. Writing: Finished revising chapter 5. Today's Quote:

No one keeps up his enthusiasm automatically. Enthusiasm must be nourished with
new actions, new aspirations, new efforts, new vision. It is one's own fault if
his enthusiasm is gone; he has failed to feed it. ROBERT BELANGER

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I love quotes. I subscribe to this little periodical called Good Stuff that is published every four weeks and is all quotes. (800-220-8600) And one of my feeds is a quote of the day site http://www.quotationspage.com/qotd.html Today the first quote is: "Of course the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you--if you don't play, you can't win." by Robert Heinlein Isn't that a great quote? Sometimes I just need to be reminded of those kind of things.

It's almost obscence, but I have to admit that it felt good to get up at 5:45 and come in to work to write. I love sleeping in on the weekends, but writing--well, there isn't anything else like it! (except maybe really good sex) My psyche--my soul misses that time of being totally focused. Studies show that we only use a small portion of our brain. I like to think that when I'm writing, I use a bit more than usual. (which may not say much for me, but there you go.)

Anyway, feed your passion. Write something today!

Writing in the Woods

I'm on!!!
Finally had time to go through the steps after baking about 10 dozen cookies this morning. I did manage to go for a walk in the woods early this morning and sat a couple of times with my notepad to write. Not much, but something to take to small group next week perhaps. I love the silence. I just wish I had more of it.

Revising

Today's mood: Busy but relaxed (TGIF) Today's music: Alison Moyet: Alf (awesome smoky voice) Today's writing: finished revising ch. 4

I am an obsessive rewriter, doing one draft and then another and another,
usually five. In a way, I have nothing to say but a great deal to add. GORE VIDAL (1925- )

I both love revising and hate revising. In many ways I find it much easier than creating from scratch, but there is always the niggling thought that I might actually be making it worse instead of better. Of course, that's what small groups and readers are for, right?

Yesterday I sat in the Surgery waiting room at Hackley hospital and revised chapter three and started on chapter four, laptop balanced on my knee. What would I do without my laptop? I've gotten so used to it that I only use my journals for ideas, quotes, and unsticking my mind. (Okay, sometimes for venting as well.)


So how's the writing going for you?

By the way, several of you received an invitation to be an author on this blog. If you didn't and would like to be, let me know what email address you want me to put in.

Welcome

Hello writers!

I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function
achieved, which a cow enjoys on giving milk. H.L. Mencken
(1880-1956)

Peninsula Writers' Conferences are great. I always come back from them physically worn out, but creatively, mentally, and emotionally charged up and ready to keep writing. The trick for me is maintaining that energy--that charge--throughout the year. Yes, writing is a solitary pursuit. Butt in chair as Heather Sellers says. But being able to say, I wrote 47 words today, to someone who understands what an accomplishment that can be, is the difference between getting up the next day sufficiently to write, or giving up the next day.

I hope this blog is one way that we can stay connected as a writing community--whether it is to celebrate the writing life, or gripe about technology that fails, words that won't come, or form rejections. It's all part of being a writer--a very tender part that needs lots of nurturing or it cries like a baby before giving up and going into fetal position.

Since this blog thing is new to me, you'll have to be patient and promise not to write me into one of your stories--unless it's as some sexy woman who is a great writer and publishes many books. On second thought--just leave me out of it altogether.

Anyway, I hope to hear from you, and if you want to be put on as an author--meaning you can add a post rather than just comment on a post--let me know. (I don't think there is a limit to how many people can be listed as author.)

So...butt in chair and get writing. (even if it is only to comment on this post.)